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Old 12-05-2020, 11:33   #31
Malcolm Tucker
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So everyone who can't work from home should go back to work. But not Monday like you'd probably assume would be the first working day after a Sunday, but on Wednesday. When we say everyone, we don't mean everyone. Not hairdressers or stuff like that. You need to be socially distancing at work, unless you can't, in which case wear a mask, which doesn't really protect you. When we say mask, we mean a piece of cloth, masks are for NHS workers. Wear them while you're shopping. Beforehand the virus was not present in Sainsburys, so we didn't want you to cover your face but the virus has now mutated and can now pass through supermarket doors so it's time for everyone to start wearing face coverings.

Don't go on public transport. Walk, cycle or teleport to work. We understand it's hard to do social distancing on a train so to help, we'll run reduced services. That's right, to help the carriages be less crowded, we'll be running fewer of them, less often.

Go outside as often as you like, but remain at home as much as possible. Visit one parent at a time in the park, not both. If strangers are the same distance away from you as your parent, that's fine, but if you recognise one of those strangers, you must leave the park. Or they must. Preferably both. All of this is England only. Not yet though, Wednesday onwards idiots.

Do not talk in the street. Only gather in the street to clap and bang pots on a Thursday at 8pm, or in special circumstances to sing Vera Lynn's absolute bangers. All other times please stay at home as much as possible, unless you're going out for your unlimited daily exercise.

You can go to the beach, drive there if you want, while taking a break from remaining at home as much as possible. Unless it's in Wales in which case you'll be arrested.

What's not to understand.
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Last edited by Malcolm Tucker; 12-05-2020 at 11:44.
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Old 12-05-2020, 18:15   #32
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Furlough scheme extended... problem is the longer it goes on the less likely their job will exist when it ends. And a load of people might get binned off in August if employers have to take on a significant chunk of that 80% cost.
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Old 13-05-2020, 09:11   #33
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Lol this is so mint

All these lazy bastards enjoying furlough, getting pissed, thinking they’re on some extended public holiday, they are suddenly going to be made redundant and lose everything they ever had because millions of idiots are going to be fighting to get a job in screwfix or starve to death

LOOOOL
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Old 13-05-2020, 13:48   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moses View Post
Furlough scheme extended... problem is the longer it goes on the less likely their job will exist when it ends. And a load of people might get binned off in August if employers have to take on a significant chunk of that 80% cost.
1922 committee are going apeshit They think Sunak harbours socialist ideals and is going way too far with all this, but the alternative is blatantly worse IMO. The amount of businesses that would be gone by now would be staggering. It' so much easier to resume 'paused' businesses than to let them go under and wait for them to organically come back. This still won't save all of them obviously, but it's a bit like Deep Impact, save who you can in the mountain bunkers, you'll need them to rebuild when the dust settles. Some will still die before then, but it's better than just stay out in the open and try to plod on regardless of the comet hitting.

The old backbench codgers still cling to old free market philosophies, let the market decide, adapt to survive etc. Applicable for some stuff, but only in normal times. Businesses in services/hospitality etc simply will not survive this under the usual capitalist tools. They need state intervention to have any hope, it's an awkward truth for the Tories. Can you imagine if the majority wasn't so solid? Still a fractured minority government? There'd have been about 20 coups by now.
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Last edited by Malcolm Tucker; 13-05-2020 at 13:53.
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Old 13-05-2020, 13:51   #35
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Most of the country was already on furlough anyway judging by the amount of tax credits going around
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Old 13-05-2020, 13:57   #36
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Apparently if you include pubic sector workers the state is now paying over half of all wages.
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Old 13-05-2020, 15:38   #37
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Think it's if you include furloughed people, public sector and benefits recipients/pensioners.

They have to keep the scheme running now, but it's soooooo expensive they'll have to ratchet it down once businesses are allowed to work again... although obvs loads will fail at that point.
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Old 13-05-2020, 16:09   #38
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Be honest then, who here is worried about their current employment?
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Old 13-05-2020, 16:20   #39
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I work for a pub. Little bit worried, but then its part of a big chain so will most likely be ok.

If I get made redundant its not a big deal because I don't actually need to work, I do it for something to do.
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Old 13-05-2020, 17:35   #40
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That's bait .
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